Last Tuesday our youngest child moved out on his own. He went apartment hunting the previous week, fell in love with the first place he looked at and put down a deposit.
He’s been talking about moving out every now and then for the past 2 years. He would sit down, calculate a budget and decide that it was more economical to live at home. This was fine with Mr. Accountability and myself. We both had troubled childhoods and leaving home was not pleasant and definitely not when we were comfortable with it, so we wanted to provide that for our children.
I’ve said in a post before, “…you can analyze things and plan and figure it all out, but sometimes when it’s time, it’s time.” AJ decided it was time, the final straw being his car breaking down repeatedly.
He decided he needed to be closer to his job, and made plans to move to the big city.
I’m curious to see if our expenses will go down. Here are the areas which could be affected:
- Groceries. AJ was buying most of his own food, but he did still partake in some family meals, and also used things like butter, mayonnaise, spices, etc.
- Electricity. It will be interesting to see if the bill decreases. AJ had a habit of doing laundry during on-peak hours when the electricity was higher. He also worked from home with several computers and three monitors.
- Water. Mr. Accountability thinks our water bill will go down. We’ll have to see about that. It’s not like AJ drank 500 gallons of water each month or took thirty minute showers. He only did one or two loads of laundry each week and I think the washer holds about 30 gallons.
- Auto Insurance. Although AJ was paying his own auto insurance, so it won’t really affect us that much.
- AAA. I was paying for Triple A for AJ and he will need to get coverage himself now, if he wants to keep it.
Two things that have gone up. AJ and I were splitting the cost of the Internet, which I now have to pay by myself, and we were also sharing his Amazon Prime account. I have already upgraded. I save time and money by shopping at Amazon. It is so much easier to find what I’m looking for and have it shipped, rather than to make calls and drive. For example, one of the vitamins I take regularly I now have shipped on a subscription and it comes automatically to me each month.
I will be taking his bedroom and converting it into my office. I am looking forward to that, and I should be able to consider that room a business expense on our income taxes.
I was not prepared for the emotional upheaval that would result in AJ moving out, indeed my heart felt broken. I have read dozens of parenting books but I had no idea “Empty Nest Syndrome” meant “heart broken in pieces”. In googling the term I learned that parents actually go through a grieving process as their children leave home, so that was reassuring to know that the feelings I was having were normal and to be expected.
I’m very proud of him, and glad that he is mature enough to make this move onto his own. This is what is supposed to happen. Young people eventually leave home. It’s a sign we succeeded as parents.
How was it when you left home? Was it a happy or sad time? Have you ever had a child leave home?